Last Chance Safari Company:

With my fiftieth birthday behind me, I have to accept the fact that there is a very good chance that I have lived the faster half of my life, and were there to be anything left that needs to be accomplished, I guess the last half of my life is the going to be the time to accomplish it. Theodore Roosevelt defined "Safari" as being the term employed to denote both the caravan with which one makes an expedition and the expedition itself. Elsewhere, Safari is defined as the Swahili word for journey. I have spent the first half of my life preparing for this journey, now is the time to enjoy and celebrate the trip. The terrible thing about life is that there are no second takes, life has no practice runs, you get only one chance in life to get it right, in effect this is your last chance get it right or get it wrong , this is the last chance, This virtual existence is the chronicle of my last chance safari. If you will accompany me, I will introduce you to the players and the participants in this endeavor and show you around the place.

The Cadamech:
Kanga- My Little Lady Roo- Pedigreed chocolate Labrador, premier snake charmer and rat router, and definitely a chocolate moose.
Kanga's Only Hope- A fine chocolate offspring of the previous dam anda whirlwwind weekend with a southern gentleman, Our Bare Necessities.
Union's Black Jack- obviously mother's favorite young dog, when you count the number of times that you hear mother reminding him of one trespass or another beyond the boundary of mothers code of acceptable conduct in the house
Miss T J dunnit- the Buckskin princess
Nifty's Whisper- not just another line-back dunn, but a true painted dancer
Leo- a genuine fine old quarter horse mare
Georgia Cowby- no-one ever promised brains in a package this big
Sonny- everyone's favorite old faithful- presently presiding over Sonny Knoll

the two regal cats, and assorted other other scurrrying critters,mostly temporary guests.

Dalton Coach and Casket Shop
(The workshop to eternity)
Maybe first I should to explain to you what I believe eternity is. Eternity is along time. Eternity is the time frame of waiting for your turn in the bathroom in a house full of women. It's waiting for the dog's heat cycle to complete, or waiting for your children's latest fall from grace to heal. A more finite definition would be it's as long as anyone can remember. When a person does good works here on earth, they will be remembered, and when they start something or build something they will be remembered as long as what they build continuesto exist and continues to be useful. There are men who write or think great thoughts, and these words are preserved for eternity as long as they are repeated and handed to the next generation. I, however am content to use my hands to make small and useful creations, in the hopes that when you find one of these trinkets useful, you will think of the one who thought enough of you to give this gift to you. The "shop"also makes a good place for me to be while my wife's opinion of me has a chance to mellow, and of course it is wonderful to be surrounded by dogs and testosterone operated gadgets.

Last Chance Safari Company-rules
Since this is my company, I get to make the rules and policies, for now, and viewing the shape that our society is in, the first policy has to do with weapons and tools and safety and security

1.All employees of the Safari Company will be required to become proficient with the three category of firearms: hand guns, rifles andshotguns. Proficiency will constitute a working knowledge of proper safe handling, loading and unloading and firing the weapon. Employees will also be required to know and understand the applicable firearm laws, even those that are contrary to the constitution. In order to be eligible for employment, all candidates will be required to carry and discharge firearms as part of their daily routine. The mere presence of a firearm will signify that the bearer is performing his official duties. A sharp knife will also be considered as part of each employees daily dress requirement. The length and the shape of the cutting edge are of less significance than the fact that it is big enough and sharp enough to accomplish the task at hand. It is also necessary that each employee is forever mindful that a gun or a knife is only a tool, and that it is the operator's attitude that makes it a weapon, and the operators skill that makes it a useful weapon. Practice improves competency, regardless of the skill or tools involved. All other tools, powered or not fall into this category. Consequently, it will be necessary to constantly endeavor to improve the employees competency with all tools. A first aid kit should also be considered as part and parcel of each individuals' kit. Working here around ,cuts, bruises and blisters are just part of the rewards of staying out of the kitchen,however be mindful that should an infection start, the dishpan isconsidered appropriate prophylaxis prior to amputation. Hospital visit sare on your dime!

2. Racism won't be tolerated. If you dress like an idiot or act like an idiot, expect to be treated like one.

3. If you don't like what is being served for dinner , feel free to mention it to the cook, if you survive the tirade it's your turn to cook till the next fool criticizes your work.

4. Pick up after yourself. If you don't want it leave it where the puppies can chew on it or pee on it . The trash goes out on Tuesday. When I have to pick it up, out it goes. If you can't find somethingthat's a good place to look for it, if it's not Tuesday.

5. -(I'll come back to this later).